After taking the mindset test, I received the results that I am working towards a growth mindset, but my fear of failure and rejection from my peers holds me back from achieving that and my goals. I am not surprised by these results as I am far too often afraid of upsetting people and failing at life and school. I blame this fear on the fact that I was placed into gifted and talented programs as a child and never really challenged at anything during my formative years. Through the research and learning I’ve done in this class so far, I am aware that this exact thing is what leads to people having a fixed mindset. I would like to report that this fear of rejection is only majorly in an academic setting and I think I do have a growth mindset for social relations and other people. 

I know I’ve had a fear of academic rejection (rather than rejection from my peers) and I have known for a long time, so when I’m frustrated by something that is extremely challenging to me, I shut down into tears a great majority of the time. I have extremely intense emotions all of the time due to (self-diagnosed) Neurodivergent in specifically the autistic field so it only adds to my frustrations because when I get overwhelmed and upset, it makes everything 20x worse. Usually, I am able to overcome struggling and challenges, but I don’t have an easy time doing it in a mental and physical sense. Instead of helping me learn like I know it does from the various studies shown, I instead feel exhausted from the strain and just more and more frustrated at the thing I am struggling with. It makes me want to give up and curl in a ball to try and stop the overwhelming feelings of relief that it’s finally over with, residual frustration, and anger at myself for not being able to understand it the first time. It is something that I am trying to work on, but it is incredibly hard. The results of me being reluctant to do things because I am not good at it immediately and reluctant to do things really does line up for me, even if not all of the results are accurate (I do not care about what my peers think for me for the great majority of the time, but rejection among close people is true). 

I think that with more practice I can achieve the growth mindset I am trying to achieve and capable of, but it is undoubtedly going to be much more difficult for me to reach that point with the fact that my brain does not work the same way most people’s do. I am not blaming this on me not having a growth mindset, but it is certainly one of the causing factors in being stuck in this seemingly endless loop of trying to understand and live in a world that just isn’t meant for me a great majority of the time. But, I will be doing my absolute best to achieve it so I will be able to be a better educator in the future. I believe that having a growth mindset or be willing to actively try and change your mindset into a growth mindset is incredibly important for an educator to have and I want to be the best teacher I can possibly be when I get to that point in my life.

Dear Randoma Studently,

 

Hello, this is Mx Ari. I am writing you a proper letter instead of an email, because I feel like it is more personal than a simple email. You came to me yesterday (when you are reading this, I am writing this the same day) talking about how you were struggling with being able to learn the coursework on top of your other classes. I want to write you a letter talking about how struggling is completely natural, despite how presumptuous this may seem. 

Like I stated before, Struggling is a completely natural process to grow your brain. We learn best after failing and picking ourselves back up, after all. Though it may not seem like it now, I’m sure that you’ll be able to keep up and get everything done on time if you keep practicing.  I understand completely how hard it is to not be able to get everything done because of external factors, whether it be because of family or homelife, the amount of workload you’re receiving from myself and other teachers, or simply because your brain is not letting you be able to do things. I, myself, have experienced all of those and struggled to cope with them. I have what is called executive dysfunction due to low dopamine levels in my brain, which means doing  things like focusing and completing things, even if I’m interested in it; but it is so so much harder when you aren’t interested in the task. That is why I try to give primarily classwork over homework. I’ve found that being in an environment where you’re already focused and on the task makes it much easier to get it done. 

I am not insinuating that you have the same thing as I do (but if you’re interested in researching more into it, I would highly recommend it), but I am simply trying to express that I have experienced similar things and you are not alone in feeling overwhelmed and unable to do schoolwork. I doubt you are “lazy” and I think you are a very hardworking individual. This is why I suggest that you take advantage of my no-penalty late work policy and make sure you’re able to get your other class work done when you can. And if you need an extension on the one hard deadline I have, please email me and just keep me informed. 

As for some strategies to keep focused that I’ve found, there are very few that have worked for me, as many other people with executive dysfunction. But I would recommend trying different strategies until you find something that works for you. For example, if you feel like you would be able to use a planner to help you, you should invest in one and highlighters, if you instead are able to get things done with reminders in your phone, you should try that. Another strategy would be to have a friend of yours remind you and make sure you’re on task so you will be able to get it done with the fear of rejection and failure your friend instills in you. If none of these work, I suggest that you should keep trying to find new ways. Part of learning and growing is trying out new things and failing. Though it is extremely disheartening, that’s just a part of being human and growing. If we never did anything we had trouble with, we would not be where we are as a species. If most people in our species were able to think this way, we most certainly would be far further ahead than we are today.

Preventing struggles is almost impossible to be able to complete as that is what our brains need to grow, but being able to overcome it with strategies is what makes life life. For humans and animals alike. When we push through the struggle and are able to find a way to get past it or work through it, prepares us for something else similar that we could struggle with later on. So, my advice is to work through the struggles to the best of your ability and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Build the foundations of struggling and working–learning–through them when you are still learning all of the time and your brain hasn’t finished developing. It is so much easier to be able to have the foundation for these skills for when you are struggling with things that are harder to get help for. I’ll be here for you whenever you ask. 

 

I hope you have a wonderful day, and remember to just keep me informed for when you intend to turn things in. 

 

With much love, your teacher,

 

Mx. Ari

Salutations

 

My name is Ari and I need to write about myself for my blog, so here it is :,)

Some things about me:

• I write, read, and play clarinet
• I use any pronouns and am AroAce
• I draw and am not very good at it though I am trying
• I am writing a graphic novel (ironic)
• I’m in drama and enjoy making slideshows
• I sometimes make my own earrings :))
• My sense of style is immaculate
• My dream job is being an author, but I also want to be an English Teacher

Continuing that thought, the reason I wish to pursue a career in education is because I genuinely enjoy teaching and English is one of my favorite subjects. I want to be able to provide an environment where people can grow and learn without being judged because being judged by others is one of the worst feelings. Since humans are pack animals and depend on society to be healthy in the head (that’s why seclusion can be so devastating to the human mind) being judged and not being able to interact with your peers positively is truly an isolating experience and not being accepted by peers truly affects and destroys a person’s head. An example of this is the rate of suicide among transgender youth when they are accepted by their parents vs. when they are not. A direct quote from the Trevor Project website says, “Transgender Health that found acceptance of one’s gender identity from adults and peers was associated with significantly lower odds of attempting suicide among transgender and nonbinary youth”. The writer, Josh Weaver, continues to describe how 8,000 transgender and nonbinary youth study from across the United States were asked to take part of this sample and this is what they concluded. Another direct quote from one of the doctors (Dr. Myeshia Price) at the Trevor Project foundation states; “The findings of this study are clear: transgender and nonbinary young people who feel accepted by the people in their lives, are less likely to attempt suicide,”. Key findings from the article, ” “Association of Gender Identity Acceptance with Fewer Suicide Attempts among Transgender and Nonbinary Youth,” that was referenced in the article by the Trevor Project tells the reader that, “Transgender youth with acceptance from at least one adult had 39% lower odds of attempting suicide in the past year compared with their transgender peers who were not accepted”. In conclusion to this point, I believe that providing people (and especially youths) with a safe space to just exist in with no question of whether or not they will be accepted is incredibly important and I want to be someone who provides that if I can.

 

Something I am passionate about is my writing. As you can see on this page, I took a creative writing class before and posted my writings on here as well as an attempted other sites but they did not publish my submission (unfortunately). As you have seem before, I am writing a graphic novel and, while I don’t have the story fully mapped out yet, I am working on it when I have the time. Drawing and writing are something I love and I absolutely can’t wait until I can put my characters and ideas to the page once I fully get the loose version of the story written out. I refuse to have bad writing in my trilogy whatsoever.

 

 

 

Sources: (APA formatting does not work on a blog post, so please live with me TvT)

Weaver, B. Y. J., & Weaver, J. (2021, November 3). Acceptance of transgender and nonbinary youth from adults and peers associated with significantly lower rates of attempting suicide. TheTrevor Project. Retrieved January 17, 2023, from https://www.thetrevorproject.org/blog/acceptance-of-transgender-and-nonbinary-youth-from-adults-and-peers-associated-with-significantly-lower-rates-of-attempting-suicide/ 

Price, M. N., & Green, A. E. (2021, November 1). Association of Gender Identity Acceptance with fewer suicide attempts … Mary Ann Liebert, Inc. Retrieved January 17, 2023, from https://www.liebertpub.com/doi/10.1089/trgh.2021.0079

Our story starts with a seemingly normal day in March. 

 

It just so happens, on this blissfully normal day in March, the Queen of an ancient kingdom gave birth to the first–and only–heir to her and her husband’s kingdom. What made this day peculiar after all of the usual normalcy of the quiet spring, was the child herself. The Princess seemed to be perfectly healthy (which was a relief since both of the royals were in their elderly years) but she was different. It seemed like there had to be a curse set on the Queen or the King, or just the royal family, but there was none that anyone in the court could remember. But there she was, their daughter born with thin leathery wings, bright red scales, and tiny little claws. It was obviously the King’s Daughter as well (‘She has your eyes, sire!’ one of the midwives had said; ‘And look at that face shape, definitely akin to yours, Your Majesty!’ another had butted in while helping clean up the room from the mess of a long and complicated delivery), so it wasn’t like the Queen could have had an affair, and she wouldn’t have anyway. They had married for love, after all, and still spent great amounts of time together despite their busy schedules. 

So what could have possibly happened to cause the Princess to turn out this way? No one knew. The King immediately sent for all of the curse breakers in the land to try and cure their darling baby before the curse completely sunk its claws into her. But no one knew what was happening or how to break it. So, they learned to live with her curse. They loved their girl after all, and she acted like a completely normal baby–despite the circumstances–so what should they do other than treat her with all of the love they held for her? 

They loved her without expectation and absolutely cherished their daughter–even when she was fussy or would cry at the smallest of things, as she was a very small clumsy little girl growing up. You could chalk up her clumsiness to the large wings on the back of her body and no other sort of dragon representation to learn to walk properly. The King could never even think of denying how proud he was of the Princess, whether it was when she clapped her hands for the first time or was running around like a chicken without a head. When she had flown across the room for the first time at three years old, he had cried joyful tears despite being in front of his court. He remembered that as one of the happiest moments of his life. Of course, there were ups and downs–the Princess was still a child, after all, and she had her deal of tantrums and fights with her parents–but they all loved one another as much as they loved their kingdom. Even though the Princess was not keen on the countless lessons she had to attend (especially the ones on how to act with proper manners and how to rule the kingdom) when she would much, much, rather be playing in the garden or curled up and reading a book in the firelight of the hearth in the castle library–the flickering light showed off her scales so prettily and she reveled in the comfort and heat fire provided to her–she understood, to a basic level, that learning was important in the role she would grow to be. She was the sole heir of her kingdom after all; she had to do well, or else she would never be able to do anything good for the people she loved so well. 

All in all, the little Princess had a very happy life. She loved everything about it, from her friends with the servant children and maids to being able to sleep with soft blankets and pillows. But despite being such a pleasant little girl, she still had a streak of mischief, and there were plenty of other children for her to play with–and play with them she did. They played many make-believe games, and she never minded being the villain (she was the one with the best evil laugh, when it came down to it). They would play elaborate pranks (and by the standards of small children, that meant sneaking into the kitchen and playing with flour or stealing pastries meant for other noble families visiting the Princess’ parents). Which they got in trouble for, of course. The punishments were never bad, but standing while holding thick books over your head was never fun for any of the children involved. The Princess, however, never stopped with her mischief streak for well into her adult years. It simply changed over time, as many things do. 

Despite people being afraid of the Princess when they met her, she never let it get her down; she knew she had to work extra hard to get people to like her. Most of the time it wasn’t an issue. Even though she could be very headstrong and brash, the Princess was a kind girl and minded her manners most of the time. Of course, she had a few mishaps in her meetings with other nobles, who were dreadfully boring. Was it really her fault that she accidentally lit the table on fire when across from her the son of a noble was making faces at her? He was asking for it. But her welcoming personality and brave streak almost always drew people around her. She was a bright child, and was as sweet as could be for a girl that grew up with a few too many sweets for her own good; what parent doesn’t spoil their kids just a little when they are able to? Especially when hers were so loving and had great means to be able to spoil her.

She slowly grew into her form from the little dragon that could actually fit into clothes if she tried hard enough to a gangly teenager that refused to wear them altogether. How could she possibly help it when they felt so tight and unnatural against her scales? And who would want to hide them in the first place? They were prettier than any other gown at the time; they sparkled like rubies in the sunlight and were as hard as steel. The ones she shed and preened out of her coat were beautiful accessories as well, but she did not give them out if she could help it. She only gave them to the closest people to her as a display of trust. When she had first explained the concept of it being a sign of love and trust (she had read it in a book on a study of dragons with an interview of one of the ancient dragons of their time) to her parents as well as presenting both of them one that she had personally polished and carved little designs in, they all had a cry together–wish for anyone she didn’t care about deeply to have one. She was such a happy girl and it would stay that way into her teenage years–up until the attacks started.

When The Princess turned 14, she was brought to a castle out in the country during the summers. It was a tradition for royals in her lineage to do so, in order to be able to focus more on their studies and practices. It was also believed that time away from the sometimes-suffocating hold of the parents was healthy for any child. Of course, she still had staff in the castle to keep her company, but there were hardly any people her age to talk to or spend time with. This was to keep her focused in the important time for brain development of any creature.

The only people she would really get to talk to were other royal families that were invited for a few weeks in the castle. It was to practice the Princess’ skills in hosting guests as well as a friendly invitation to keep good relations with their neighboring kingdoms and people of power. It was on one of these visits that her life changed for the better. 

It was a day in May that was rainy despite the warmth surrounding the land. The Princess had been preparing to meet a royal family that her parents had just made an alliance with. She was to welcome them to a couple weeks vacation. It was after the first slightly awkward dinner full of polite smalltalk and even more awkward looks. The Princess could see that the royal family was uncomfortable with her and assured them several times over their meeting that they would not see each other much during their stay. She was extremely busy, first and foremost, and didn’t want to take away from their own explorations of the neighboring towns or the small castle and its grounds. It was usually much better to do so when it isn’t raining, but she didn’t judge other people’s actions.

She didn’t get to see the princess of the neighboring kingdom because she was feeling ill before dinner started. That dampened her mood a little bit, but she didn’t let it bother her. This trip was to make the other family comfortable with their kingdom and with the future ruler of said kingdom; it most certainly was not about her talking to people who felt uncomfortable around her. So when she saw a strange person in the gardens under a gazebo, she was shocked to see that it was the Other Princess. It was her intention to be able to visit when the visiting family wasn’t there in order to enjoy it for herself, and the girl there did not seem to be any of the small staff at the castle. The Princess hesitated for a long moment before she strengthened her stride to the gazebo and got out of the rain that was quickly picking up. She smiled at the girl and introduced herself with a low bow. The girl hesitated before she dipped her head in the direction of the Princess before she simply continued to look out at the rain. 

The Princess tried to ease the uncomfortable silence with some respectful small talk to the girl. What she got in return was short answers and no responding conversation. Once the Princess fell silent herself, she was already making plans to amend her mistake when the girl spoke up.

‘Do you think that humans or squid came first?’ 

The Princess was shocked into silence for a few moments. She stared at the girl before promptly looking away and out into the scenery. 

‘I think squids did. Humans are more complicated, so it would make sense for them to come after.’ She didn’t look at the Other Princess to see her reaction and continued to look out at the rain. It caused the ground to shimmer and the plants to drip beautifully. 

‘Most people respond with humans.’ The Other Princess remarked, sounding sort of smug with an underlying tone that the Princess couldn’t describe. 

‘If you haven’t noticed, I am not like other people.’ The Princess replied with a small laugh. She was not even a “people” as most would describe her.

 She finally looked back at the other princess to find her looking directly back. She grinned in response as the Other Princess sighed and looked away again. 

‘Of course a dragon would understand better than a human.’ That comment made the Princess bristle as she sat up slightly straighter and hardened her face. People didn’t usually remark on her being different right away, especially those of social standing who are trying to keep an alliance. 

‘Not that it’s a bad thing. I like it. I don’t like people,’ the Other Princess continued, seeming to sense her companion’s discomfort with the word.

‘Surprisingly, that does not make me feel better.’ The Princess said with a tight smile and sharp words. She had relaxed a little, but she was in a position that she had never been in before. She was the one who usually made people uncomfortable with just her presence. 

‘Sounds bad for you,’ the Other Princess said, looking back to meet her gaze. ‘But I usually don’t care about people’s emotions. They’re fickle things that don’t matter in the long run.’ 

‘Well, why say anything then?’

‘What?’

‘Why say anything when you know it is going to offend people? Or not people as I am being described as?’

‘To weed out the ones who are pleasant only out of need and not by person. People who yell as soon as they’re questioned are not the sort I wish to be around.’

‘I see… and that doesn’t seem flawed to you?’

‘Who are you? One of the people my parents hired to help me “open up”?’

‘Are they usually dragons that walk out in the beginning of a thunderstorm?’

‘Nope.’

‘Then I guess I’m not someone your parents hired.’

‘I guess not.’

‘…’

‘…’

‘Do your parents often try to expose you to other people?’

‘Don’t yours?’

‘No, I have been told I’m a bit of a “social butterfly”.’

‘Huh, do you think some of that will rub off on me?’

‘I don’t think it works like that, unfortunately, Princess.’

‘Sad, isn’t it. I guess I can’t be normal.’

‘That isn’t a bad thing. Societal standards are not always the best.’

‘I guess you’re right. But pointers wouldn’t hurt.’

‘Pointers?’

‘Yes, you should give me pointers on how you are able to be a social butterfly. Make small talk during dances and such.’

‘Okay.’

‘What?’

‘I can do that for you, it would be my Pleasure.’ The Princess said as she stood up and walked over to the other, bowing and holding out her clawed hand. She had a good foot on the Other Princess, but that didn’t bother her. The Other Princess cautiously took the Princess’ hand and stood up as the Princess kissed it before standing up to full height. 

‘You know how to waltz. Correct?’

‘I’m a princess.’

‘Just checking.’ The Princess’ voice was lighthearted and cheeky as she started to dance along to a silent waltz, taking the lead in favor of following; she had started the dance, after all. They stayed quiet for a long few minutes before the Other Princess spoke up. 

‘I don’t feel woo-d yet. Or anytype of social wisdom sinking in.’ She said sarcastically as she looked up at the Princess, craning her neck. 

‘How unfortunate, that was not my intention.’ The Princess was smiling and suppressing laughter at the Other Princess’ face. ‘Well, what would you like to talk about?’

‘I thought you were a natural at this.’ The other said with a scowl that made the Princess break and pause to laugh, causing the Other Princess to scowl more. 

‘You’re bad at this social thing.’ 

‘We don’t have to dance here.’

‘Where else would we dance?’ the Other Princess asked as the Princess pulled her out of the protection of the gazebo and into the rain.

‘We have an entire garden, Princess!’ The Princess exclaimed joyfully with a wide grin. ‘It’s a waste to be in such a small place!’

‘Maybe small for you.” The Other Princess grumbled but started to dance along with the Princess again. It was a silent but quick paced dance that led to them both tumbling inside full of giggles after their skin grew numb from the cold (well, the skin of the human princess, the Princess was still warm as a fireplace, something that extended their time outside to a much greater degree then possible for two humans). The Princess asked one of the maids to make them a pot of hot chocolate as well as bring the Other Princess a change of dry clothes as she dragged her to the library. 

It was wall to wall with books and a large fireplace in the center, surrounded by plush furniture. The Princess started a fire as the other left to change in one of the nearby bathrooms. When the Other Princess returned, the fire was high and the Princess was bringing over some blankets from a chest. She handed one to her companion and set the rest of them down on a couch. The night ended with them talking and eventually falling asleep next to each other in the library. 

They grew closer and closer until the day the Other Princess was forced to leave with her family. She promised to write letters and visit whenever she could, but they were both incredibly sad when they were forced to part with one another. 

They didn’t get to see each other until the following summer despite many letters and gifts sent between them. They were both agonized by the distance, but managed to keep themselves sane and busy. The Princess did so by throwing herself into her studies and tending flowers by her window. Even through the cold and harsh winters she was able to keep the flowers (and various other plants) alive in her room, away from the beautiful death of the snowfall. The Other Princess kept to herself and stayed in her usual life the way she always did. She was not the heir to the throne once her baby brother was born, so she was able to spend more time doing things she enjoyed rather than studying and lessons day in and out like the Princess did.

By the time they got to meet each other again, the Princess had taken to wearing flowers braided into her hair (if you could call it hair–it resembled a mane on a horse rather than human hair, but less coarse). She did the majority of it by herself, but she did receive help from her handmaidens from time to time. They reunited for another summer happily and agreed it was much less awkward than when the Other Princess’ parents were hovering over them in the castle. 

That summer went off without a hitch.The two of them were able to spend time together and officially start a long courtship process with official dates and gifts bestowed on each family by the other one. Both of the Princesses’ parents were very happy for the arrangement–The dragon’s for finding love at such a young age and the human’s for marrying royalty and into further nobility. It was a fun summer and they were able to grow closer and closer to each other then possible with only being able to write letters that wouldn’t get read for several weeks.

 The summer passed by all too quickly, then the next, and the next, with only a few interruptions. It wasn’t until the summer of the seventeenth year of the Princess’ life that things got more serious. Warriors and soldiers were coming almost every week from other kingdoms to ‘slay the beast’ and ‘save the fair maiden,’ whatever that was about. The first time it had happened was a surprise to everyone in the small castle and the countryside. It was a warm day and everyone was relaxing in the sun per the Princess’ request. She wanted to have everyone be able to enjoy the sun with her and gave them the day off. When the Warrior burst into the palace, she was with her handmaids and the Other Princess, doing some personal care for one another. She was in the middle of applying a homemade mud mask to one of them and abruptly stopped and looked up in shock. She was not expecting anyone to burst in, and she did not recognize the man. When the others with her did not recognize him either, she started to ask questions. 

‘Who are you? Why are you here?’ She asked, setting the bowl aside so she could have her hands free. 

‘I am here to slay you and release all those you hold captive!’ The Warrior exclaimed, as he drew his sword and raised it towards the Princess. He lowered it in shock when all of the handmaidens and maids around him started to giggle amongst themselves. The Princess sighed at the proclamation and stayed sitting on her bed.

‘There is nothing to be slain, I don’t know what you heard, Sir, but I-’

Enough of your talking, fiend! I will not stand for you using your silver tongue to entice me! Speak no further and we shall battle!” the Warrior spat as he glared at the Princess.

‘No.’ she said simply and glared at the Warrior. ‘Please leave the premises before I have to ask my guards to escort you on their day off.’ 

‘Day off??? What is this madness you speak of, evil beast!’ the Warrior demanded an answer as he raised his sword again towards the Princess. He was so focused on the disapproving look on the dragon’s face that he was almost knocked over when the door opened from behind him, the Other Princess walking in with a plate of cookies and some fruit. She looked puzzled upon seeing the Warrior and looked around at all of the other girls either gawking or giggling behind their hands at him. 

‘What did I miss?’ she asked, still holding the food as she closed the door with her foot and took a step back.

‘Fair Maiden!’ the Warrior exclaimed in return, not taking his eyes off of the Princess. ‘I am here to protect and save you from this beast!’ 

‘I don’t need saving. This isn’t my castle,’ the Other Princess stated simply as she moved in a wide radius to the Warrior so she could stand uninterrupted next to her betrothed. ‘Who would I even need saving from in the first place?’

‘The beast you are currently standing next to! Are you blind?! Are you under some sort of spell?!’ The Princess rubbed her temples and sighed. 

‘This early in the year? I would have thought them to have been done by now.’ She grumbled as the Other Princess rolled her eyes and set the food down on the bed. 

‘As fun as this is, you should leave before you get punched in your face,’ The princess who was human said while she crossed her arms over her chest. She did not look amused and looked like she was the one who was going to do the aforementioned punching. 

‘I will not leave until all of you are safe from the beast!’ The Warrior, of course, did not pick up on this look and seemed to be stuck in his head of what is right and wrong, as most warriors of the time period did.

‘Then this is news for you, good sir, I don’t need saving. No one here needs saving. You should just leave before I stuff a pillow down your throat.’ The Other Princess snarled, to have the dragon place a hand on her shoulder. 

‘It’s fine, you do not need to resort to violence,’ the Princess said calmly, ever the peace-maker and diplomat when she could be.

‘Shut up! You aren’t a part of this,’ the Other Princess retorted as she continued to stare daggers at the shocked Warrior in front of her. 

‘That is no way for a lady to speak! Are you the one casting a spell? To make yourself look like a proper lady when you are a blithering old hag?’ The Other Princess looked like she was going to actually assault the man when the Princess stood up and stopped her. 

‘Why don’t we have tea? you look like you’re extremely weary,’ she said pleasantly as she looked at her handmaidens who were already getting up to prepare it. ‘You all stay here, this will be done in only a few minutes, please continue what you were doing,’ she continued before she simply walked past the Warrior and made her way out of her bedroom. The Warrior was too stunned to speak, less move, and had to be pushed by the Other Princess to even seem to wrap it around his head. He was quickly shut up and angrily led to the small sitting room where the Princess had already prepared tea and some biscuits. She invited the Warrior to sit down and they had a very long conversation that the Warrior was far too dazed to really take a part of. Once they were done, he left with a few extra biscuits. 

A very similar process happened repeatedly that summer, to the point where the Princess made a sign and put it at the front for people to stop walking in at impossible hours. No one ever paid attention to it, of course, but it was the thought that counted. 

On the day of the Princess’ eighteenth birthday was when she proposed to the other Princess with a ring and one of her scales elegantly carved and strung on a cord. Of course the Other Princess said yes. They were planning the wedding in the spring of four years in the future when the King and Queen announced that they would be stepping down from the throne. It was just two years later when they announced it; they were old and tired of ruling and thought that the twenty year old princess was ready for it all on her own. She hesitantly agreed with the promised support and guidance from them and her fiancee. With the overtaking of the throne, the wedding between the two Princesses was placed on hold in return for the added stress of ruling the kingdom as a twenty year old Dragon. The Princess was not fully ready to take over, but it wasn’t like she had a choice. Her parents were getting old and if she wasn’t ready soon she would have to start her rule when her parents died instead of with their guidance. The dragon’s fiancee was as supportive as she could be despite the stress causing the Princess to freak out sometimes and start small arguments. It kept happening and happening until the Princess’ Fiancee stopped her in the middle of a stressful spiel. 

‘Love, stop.’ she said, rubbing her temples. The Princess immediately did what her partner asked of her, but she did not look happy. In fact, she looked confused. 

‘You were going to cause an argument because you’re stressed planning a wedding and getting prepared to take over your parent’s kingdom.’ she continued as she gently placed a hand on the Princess’ shoulder and moved closer to her. 

‘That’s enough work today, okay. Let’s go back to bed.’ The Princess’ Fiancee’s tone was not that of a question as she basically demanded the Princess to stop working, even if just for the night. She started to pull her towards the bed when the Princess suddenly stopped

“I… but, Darling, I need to finish this. These reports are important and then once I finish I can work on our wedding finally without it being interrupted by more work.’ she protested as her fiancee stopped and looked back, placing her hands on her hips. 

‘Love, if you do not go to bed this instant, you aren’t going to be able to plan a wedding because you make horrible decisions when you are incredibly tired. And I have the right to veto everything you do for our wedding that is happening in four years.’ the human was done putting up with her fiancee and was ready to deck her if that meant she would finally get some sleep.

Instead of getting mad or upset, the Princess simply laughed softly, ‘Fine, fine, my love. You know best.’ the human relaxed at her dragon partner’s words and gently took her hand instead of harshly grabbing her arm. ‘But,’ the Princess continued, grinning to herself, ‘Does this mean you don’t want to dance with me tonight? Not even a little bit?’ 

‘Oh my gosh, no, Love. Go to bed.’ they were both laughing now as the Princess slowly undid her hair and her partner watched from under the covers. They cuddled close to one another and quickly fell asleep.

 

Even though it took much longer than either of them had wanted it to, they both were wed soon enough. The day it happened was a beautiful day in Summer that was as warm as they were hoping for when the two, a human princess and a dragon queen, originally planned it. They were both so blissfully happy and couldn’t believe anything that was happening to them. It was surreal but ever so good and happy. The Queen was now able to relax just a little bit more when she was with her beautiful bride and the Queen Consort, the previous human princess, was just happy to finally be able to fully separate from her parent’s control. 

They ended up not having a honeymoon and had more of just a break from working for a while. But they were both more than happy because Life was busy and wonderful for the both of them. Even as the Queen Consort got older and older, until her hair had strands of gray and she could not dance for as nearly as long as she used to, they still loved each other unconditionally. 

When the two of them were in their forties they decided to adopt a child to take the throne after them. The Little Prince was adopted by the Queen and the Queen Consort because they had found out that the latter was not able to conceive and the Queen was not willing to carry the child. He was welcomed into the family nonetheless and was also loved as he grew up a kind and thoughtful young man. The years were getting to the Queen Consort and it just wasn’t for her dragon partner. There were more silences between them now to avoid talking about something they knew was coming. Even if it was for just a bit longer. Neither of them wanted to admit that they weren’t going to be able to both spend the rest of their days together. 

As the Little Prince grew from a small child to a young man, and then an adult, the Queen Consort caught an illness that forced her to stay on bedrest with very limited motion or movement allowed. Everyone was devastated for the state of the The Queen Consort, and none less than the Queen herself. She was doing her absolute best to keep it together and refused to take it out on anyone or the kingdom, but she was not perfect and was going through the possible death of her beloved wife and life partner. Despite this, she was still as pleasant as she could be. She was still as attentive as a mother and a partner, and still a wonderful Queen for the kingdom.

For a while, things got better. The Queen Consort was able to get up again and move around. She could even walk around the gardens with the Little Prince and her wife, the Queen, for an hour or so before she had to go back to bed. At the news that she was getting better, everyone was overjoyed and celebrated. All of the kingdom’s citizens loved both the queens and were all devastated to hear the news that the human could die soon; so when there was large news that she was getting better, celebrating was the only proper way to react. There was a large party once it was announced that the Queen Consort would be able to walk whenever she wanted and be able to resume her visits to the central city as long as she took frequent breaks. Everyone was overjoyed, but not as much as the Prince and the Queen herself. 

Soon the years had gone by and the Prince was close to his twentieth birthday. The queens and their son had talked about it at length and the Little Prince  decided that he wanted to learn more about ruling before he became King of the land. He didn’t want to make mistakes that the Queen had made early in her rule that cost the kingdom. The Queen agreed and they made a plant to wait until the Prince’s 30th birthday before they spoke of it again. 

The Queen and her wife danced as often as they could. They were almost always silent and it was always very slow, but in the moonlight neither of them cared. They loved their dances and they loved each other more than either of them could describe. The dances were getting shorter and shorter over the years, but the Queen didn’t care. As long as she had her beloved bride, she didn’t care how much time they spent together. They were inarguably in love and happy with one another. Not one person in the kingdom–as far as anyone knew–disagreed that fact. You could see it in the way the queens moved and looked at each other; they seemed to be in sync and it was impossible to tear them apart. They had their own activities, of course, but they would share things they did with each other and take great joy in doing so. 

The years continued to speed by at what seemed all too fast. Soon enough, the Prince married at age 29 to such a lovely girl that he met while riding one day. Then three years later,

he was 32 and, with guidance from his mothers, took over the throne and married his wife. He was eager and happy with his new partner. The kingdom was joyous and there was little hardship in this perfect Golden Age of prosperity.

Unfortunately, it had to come to an end all too soon. 

The queens had danced for hours one night (something they were not able to do for such a long time), twirling and swaying together late into the night. When the Queen finally coaxed her bride into bed to sleep, she was peaceful. She was happy. It had been a good day for both of them despite the Queen Consort’s condition. She was getting old and the Queen knew it was going to be soon, but when it finally came… She couldn’t handle it. 

She had woken up that morning to a cold body curled up beside her. A cold body with a smile still on her beautiful wrinkled face. A cry of anguish and pure raw pain tore through the castle, waking everyone up as the Queen scooped up the body of her true love and cradled her to her chest. She couldn’t stop as her son burst into the room; couldn’t be strong as the cold dead body of the most important person in her life was motionless, still, and pale. 

Never again would she ever hear her laughter, see her smirk when she got her way or when she was proud of herself, never see the caring look whenever she looked upon the Queen or the Little Prince (now King). Never would she get to hold her hand, whisper ‘I love you’ to each other in the dead of night with only the stars to witness, never sneak a kiss and see her beautiful face flush.

She would never get to hold or see their grandchildren. Never get to look upon the stars or see another meteor shower. Never get to have another flower crown placed upon her head in place of the diadem she normally wore. 

She would never get to dance in the pale moonlight ever again. Neither of them would. 

 

The funeral was only a few days later, but they seemed to both go by in a flash and drag on painfully slowly. The Queen Mother and the King were silent. The Former Queen was trying so hard to be there for her son, to be strong and be the rock for him. He just lost one of his parents at such an early point of his reign. She tried so hard, but she was not able to hold back her own tears, her sobs. She wanted to reach out to the stars and beg them for another chance to be with her again. Just one last time to see her, but she knew if her request was ever granted she would never let go.

 

After the Queen Consort was buried, her son joined her sixty years later. Then her grandchildren, her great grandchildren and everyone past that. She disappeared suddenly after her great great great great great grandchildren were born and no one has ever seen her again. 

 

~~~

 

‘There you have it, the story you were hoping for. Was it all you expected it to be?’

‘It ends like that?’

‘Yes.’

‘I thought stories were supposed to have happy endings.’

‘Very rarely are any of the endings ever truly happy. You just get to close the book before you see the sad bits.’

‘…She was you, wasn’t she?’

‘Whoever do you mean, youngling?’

‘The Princess.’

‘What makes you think that?’

‘You’re a dragon.’

‘Not all dragons are the same, child.’

‘I know but-’

‘You should get home, finish your tea and I will lead you to the trail.’

‘Can I come back tomorrow?’

‘Whatever for?’

‘For another story/’

‘That was the only one I know.’

‘How about I tell you one tomorrow!’

‘That sounds nice. Thank you.’